by Helen and George Jesze – 4th September 2026
A lady came to George for counselling. Her husband had died 20 years before and although there was no reason to do so, she blamed herself for his death. She relived every mistake, every sharp word that was said and lived under the curse of self-condemnation.
He said to her: ‘We all make mistakes but God forgives us. He not only forgives but he
forgets. He is not like people who often tell us — by their looks and actions, if not by words — I’ve forgiven you but I would just like to remind you that I have forgiven you, just so that we feel guilty again! Even if you were responsible for your husband’s death, which I don’t believe you were, God will forgive you and wipe your slate clean. Your trouble is that you won’t forgive yourself and are allowing the devil to keep you under condemnation. We are often harder on ourselves than God is on us.’ He prayed for her and then asked her to repeat the words: ‘I forgive myself. I renounce all guilt and self-condemnation for Jesus has forgiven me. In him I am justified, in him I am cleansed, as clean today as if I had never sinned. Thank you Jesus, for delivering me now!’ The depression left her face and this lady went away radiant — the load of 20 years had lifted from her.
We cannot change the past.There is not a person alive who has never made mistakes.
Some people are so afraid of making a mistake that they never attempt anything worthwhile, and that is often their biggest mistake. We should learn from our mistakes and from the mistakes of others, but we must press on to new things.
The Apostle Paul must often have been reminded by the devil about his past mistakes.
He had persecuted the Church, helped at Stephen’s martyrdom and fought against the claims of Christ, but he realised that was all part of his old life and he had become a new person. In 2 Cor 5:17 he writes: ‘If any man is in Christ he is a new creature; the old things are passed away, behold, all things are become new.’ The old Saul died on the way to Damascus and a new Paul emerged who became a mighty giant for God. He forgave himself and put the past behind him.
We once knew a woman who always reminded her husband of something he had done 18 years before. ‘If only you hadn’t done so-and-so, we wouldn’t be in this mess’. She ranted and raved at him constantly. Condemnation flooded over her husband every time he heard her and paralysed every creative thought and impulse to do better today.
What if he had made a mistake? Perhaps it was a very grave one, but she did not realise that her unforgiveness and fretting were just as bad, if not worse, in the sight of God.
Proverbs 14:1 tells us: ‘Every wise woman builds her house: but the foolish plucks it
down with her hands.’ A happy marriage and family has to be built, just as a house is built. Sometimes it is hard work putting one brick of love and forgiveness on top of another. This woman was literally tearing down her marriage and home with her words and lack of love.
There are some things that happen which look like mistakes or defeats, but they are not. When Jesus died, it was the greatest tragedy to those who loved him. Yet he came to die and pay the price for our sins with his blood. He did not come just to do good works and then die a martyr’s death. No, he came with the end purpose of dying and rising again to deliver mankind. His death was no mistake. It was God’s perfect plan. His death was a sacrifice, not a martyrdom.
Judas and Peter betrayed Jesus. Judas hanged himself; Peter became a great Apostle. What made the difference? Both saw they had done wrong. Judas saw his mistake but did not accept God’s forgiveness. His guilt was so heavy that he took his own life. Peter ‘wept bitterly’ because he had denied the Lord in his hour of trial. He had boasted and bragged that if everyone else left Jesus, he would not, and that he was ready to die for him. Now he sat bowed with condemnation, a broken hearted man. Jesus knew what Peter was feeling, but he knew that Peter had needed this experience. Peter had many great qualities but as long as he trusted in himself, he could achieve nothing worthwhile for the Kingdom of God. Jesus knew that if Peter’s heart was not changed, next time he could become a Judas!
But Jesus never leaves us in our condemnation when we sincerely repent of our sin and mistakes, and he was getting ready to restore Peter. When the women came to the tomb and found that Jesus was risen, an angel said to them: ‘. . . go your way, tell his disciples and Peter. . .’ (Mark 16:7)
Jesus sent a special message to Peter to encourage him. His words offered forgiveness, and understanding, the promise of fresh communion with his Lord. It was as if he was saying: ‘It doesn’t matter what you have done, Peter, I love you. Accept my forgiveness and forgive yourself.’ Peter came from under the curse of condemnation, a changed man.
When we are condemning ourselves for something it destroys our confidence in God.
We cannot believe effectively, for a feeling of unworthiness stands like a spectre barring our path. Not long after we began the ‘Voice of Renewal International’ ministry, we started with radio broadcasting, one English and one German programme every week. The idea was good but the timing to take on such a financial outlay was unwise. Soon we had a big bill of DM 22,000 (£7,500) which we had no way of paying.
The little money which came in did not cover the expenses, let alone pay a bill like that.
We stormed Heaven in prayer and praise for months but no answer came. It was hard to fight off condemnation, for the devil told us that we had brought ourselves into this mess and must get ourselves out of it. But God is more merciful than the devil and will help us out of our difficulties, even if we do go into them on our own.
One day George was in Switzerland and a pastor asked him to take a camera and some books to an English lady, who had left them there when on holiday. The next time we went to England we delivered them and the lady invited us to lunch. She was a Christian and was very interested in what we were doing in Germany. A few days later she telephoned and said the Lord had told her to pay for us both to go to the Fountain Trust Conference in Newcastle. She had also been praying for guidance concerning some money she had inherited a short while before we came. The Lord showed her she was to give some of it towards the radio debt about which she had read in our newsletter.
This money and a further gift from Pat Robertson wiped out about two thirds of the debt. (George had been on Pat’s television Christian talk show – the ‘700 Club’ in 1975 in Virginia Beach, USA.) The rest of the money we were able to pay off little by little. God had done a wonderful miracle for us, but it came about by throwing off condemnation and trusting him to do the impossible.
How tragic it is to see many Christians who have never realised God’s great love for
them. They are born-again, following Jesus, but live under a weight of condemnation, and feel constantly unworthy. In some churches many sermons are preached about humility and the necessity of being humble, but this often gets confused with ‘condemnation’. A ‘sinconscious Gospel’ is repeatedly brought before the eyes of the hearers.
Some Christians are so down, they almost want to sit under the chair instead of on it and when you shake their hand, it feels as limp as a piece of dead fish! No life or confidence there.
In Charles Dickens’ novel David Copperfield there is an obnoxious character called
Uriah Heep. He was the secretary of an amiable but rather weak and shortsighted
gentleman, a Mr Wickfield. Uriah’s main characteristic, and one which he always loved to talk about, was his extreme humility. Cracking his long, skinny fingers and looking
stealthily out from red-rimmed eyes, he would fawn and bow and scrape. ‘I’m so’umble.
So very ‘umble.’
As the story develops, we find out that Uriah’s particular brand of humility was not the
genuine stuff. His ‘cooking the books’, blackmailing Mr Wickfield, cruelty and lying were fortunately all brought to light before he managed to take over the business and force Mr Wickfield’s beautiful daughter, Agnes, to marry him, and showed the real state of his heart.
While we are not trying to say that Christians who talk a lot about humility are all like
Uriah Heep, we are pointing out that there is a genuine and false humility. Genuine humility will not always be putting itself on display, but neither does it always run and hide itself. True humility will accept God’s grace and forgiveness and rejoice in it. It is insulting to God to refuse his offer and continue to walk in our ‘unworthiness’. It is his righteousness that we glory in, not our own. We know it is only his grace and upholding power that keeps us day by day. It is not being ‘humble’ to be pressed down by condemnation.
Have you ever felt uncomfortable meeting someone because of something that has
happened? This thing stands between you and you cannot feel at ease in the presence of this person. Conversation lags and you can’t look him in the eye, because your heart condemns you. There is a verse in 1 John 3:21 which speaks of this, in relation to us and God:
‘Beloved, if our heart condemn us not then have we confidence toward God.’
This verse reverses the situation by saying how wonderful it is to come into God’s
presence knowing that there is nothing between us. Every sin has been put under the blood of Jesus and we have confidence when we pray — confidence not in our own merits but because our heart does not condemn us. We can come ‘boldly to the throne of grace’ and receive help in time of need.
But for you who may be grieving over the man or woman ‘you might have been’,
there is a way out. God has promised to ‘restore the years that the locust has eaten’.
Physically we cannot turn the clock back, but God has ways of restoring those years
and making your latter years better than the preceding ones. If those years of sin have
brought terrible consequences, pray for God’s wisdom. He will show you how to come
out of this situation.
Do not stay trapped in the web of condemnation. Break out today, shake off every
bit of guilt that would cling to you and learn to walk in the light of God’s forgiveness.
Jesus does not just forgive us our past sins, but breaks the power of sin over our lives.
Take this by faith. Believe that the curse of condemnation is broken over you and you
are free to live as God intended you to be.
‘What does the Lord require of you? To do justly and to love mercy, and to walk
humbly with your God’ (Micah 6:8). He will give us the ability to do this!
(Taken from our book: Winning over Worry)